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“McDonald’s.”I frowned. “Not. What are your plans for the day?” I asked, taking a sip of coffee.“I thought I’d study for school,” she calmly announced.I choked on a mouthful of coffee, coughed hard and looked at her. The angelic smile, a Mona Lisa-like smile, showed her amusement. “Okay. Got me. What are you really planning for the day?” I coughed to clear my lungs again.“I thought I’d go to church,” she announced.“Right. And pull my other leg.”Sia laughed, bright, light, happy. It made me smile.“I’m gonna clean my room, vacuum, and do the laundry,” she informed me.Yeah, sure. “While you’re at it, mop the kitchen floor and shovel the drive, okay?”Sia laughed again, her blue and brown eyes twinkling. But then an amazing change took place. It was magical to watch. Her eyes softened, her laughter faded away to a small, almost shy smile.“I love you, Dad,” she said softly.Man-oh-man, was I lost. She very rarely told me how she felt about me, usually a quick, “Luv ya,” as she’d head out. ”✧ ✧ ✧After the floodAfter 150 days off flooding, Noah released all the animals from his ark and commanded then to go forth and multiply.After some time, he saw that the flocks and herds were regaining their numbers, but he came across a pair of snakes who had laid no eggs, and were just laying about.“Why have you not multiplied?” he asked.To which the snakes responded, “we can’t, we’re adders.”Noah being a quick thinker went off into the woods to fell some trees, and fastened them together into a platform. He then placed the snakes on the platform and lo and behold the snakes immediately laid a clutch of eggsBecause you see, even adders can multiply on a log table.Virginity is like a bubble.One prick and it’s gone.If you don’t believe in oral sex... ... keep your mouth shut.Fixing the dentsOne day a Stepford Wife entered an auto body shop claiming that she’d suffered extensive damage to her new car.The mechanic thought he’d have some fun with her so he told her that she didn’t need.
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